Two Years Later... [Sharaku]

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Tue Feb 16, 2016 1:02 pm

''They usually aren't, no....'' Nothing was really only good or only bad in the end. For there were always different consequences to everything. It was just a matter of circumstance as to which side ended up having more influence in a particular situation. Extremes tended to have more visible bad effects with time.

''That's good then...'' If she was happy about it, then it was alright in his book. It's one of the reasons he had done it for in the first place afterall. That's what mattered the most in the end. Besides, what other meaning would it have for him? It served no specific purpose, as he hadn't been trying to persuade her to do something and the like, so it was simply a gift. She looked like she needed it back then. Well, kind of. Dealing with her own indecisiveness probably served her better later on. He would raise an eyebrow slightly. ''Why not? I'm sure there aren't that many options to begin with. It's easy to take out things that no one would get happy about afterall.'' Sans exceptions, that is. But it would be rather odd for people to get happy over distasteful things. Speaking about genuine happiness, that is. Not some momentary amusement at the situation.

Hmm. ''I don't really mind. It was just a bit too sudden. That's all.'' It probably wouldn't even have had that effect, had he not been standing that close when she did it. That was the biggest deal in this matter. He would smile faintly. ''You have a job. That is more than enough. Seeing as I don't. Trust me, I don't do as much as it looks like. Usually.'' He certainly could. That was not the issue. It was just that he often lacked the motivation, with how things were going. And it times, he knew it just wasn't even necessary to begin with. He would huff lightly. ''You're one of the easier people to read. It's not always simple. I know I get things wrong at times. And some people also don't like hearing things, even if they are the truth. I sometimes don't either.'' Doing what he did was also what often got him at odds with others. But certain habits are hard to shake. ''I'm glad to help, though.'', he'd add, his tone somewhat melancholic.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Tue Feb 16, 2016 1:38 pm

Sharaku probably realised just how important his actions had been for Mae at the time... Being forced through the event, the whole Charles situation and her own confusion about it all served to make the pinkette's life not so great at the time. She was going through an emotional rollercoaster, and Sharaku had been there... being, at the time, one of the very few bright spots in her life, and a very bright one at that. Would she ever be able to repay him for what he did? Probably not, no matter how much she wished there to be a way.

"Hrm... I dunno about that. You're pretty mysterious." Mae said with a soft giggle. "Well, at least I was on the right track." So there was that. She didn't feel like she knew him well enough to give him the whole right answer straight away.

Mae nodded in response before dropping the subject regarding the accidental jumpscare. She would have to be a bit more careful in the future. "Hehe, if you say so." Mae said with a timid smile in return. She would never really be able to take much praise from others easily... Sharaku was no exception. But here, she gave in. "Those kids there are my everything right now..." A glint of pride could be seen in the woman's eyes at the mention of the kids. "The truth always hurts... but it's better than lying. You just want the best for others... It's a good trait, as much as others don't see it that way." She then slowly raised an eyebrow at Sharaku's somewhat saddened smile... Something wasn't right. Who says "I'm glad to help" with an expression like that if everything's a-ok?

Two Years Later... [Sharaku] - Page 4 Sakura_miku_by_windykun-d4zu6iu

"Is... everything alright, Sharaku?"

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Tue Feb 16, 2016 4:20 pm

''I suppose mysterious is my middle name by this point.'' He seemed at least mildly amused by that. He couldn't blame her though. A lot of things in regards to him were often left up to guesses, unless the person was very perceptive and could make a correct picture even from little base information. He both minded and didn't though. It could be exasperating at times, when people just kept getting him wrong. On the other hand, he did like his privacy, and would probably not be comfortable with a lot of people knowing him inside out. It was a slight paradox, in its own way.

Well, yes. ''I do indeed say so.'', he'd remark, mostly leaving it at that. It didn't seem she wanted to drag out the subject more than necessary anyway. He would look at her thoughtfully. ''Interesting...But they're not your own kids, right? Do you plan on having any?'' Perhaps an odd question coming from him, but he seemed to be interested for whatever reason. Besides, it was a valid question. Orphan kids were her everything...but what about her own future, hm? Not that it mattered to him specifically, but he had the knack for caring about pointless things. ''But if the others don't see it, it's not as good as it sounds, is it? That's like being invisible while being able to make a good impression. Yet, you won't because you might as well just be doing it to yourself in that state.'' The analogy was perhaps a little unusual, but for his standards, it worked.

He would blink a few times, actually giving her a genuinely puzzled look. It didn't take him too long to catch on, though. Ah yes, that. He would smirk softly, showing his fangs a bit. ''It's fine. No need to worry. I was just...thinking about things. My mood tends to fluctuate a lot. This is kind of normal, I think. Maybe it's the past matters. Thinking about stuff that happened before seems to bring me sad moods most of the time....'', he would answer, keeping a fairly light-hearted tone. Surprisingly enough, he didn't try evading answers for now. Perhaps he just wasn't in the mood. Or he didn't feel like there was a point in hiding it. It was true that he did have quite...severe mood swings at times. And while he was quite adept at dealing with them, it did occasionally show, for he wasn't made of stone either.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Tue Feb 16, 2016 4:51 pm

"Not that it's really a bad thing. It... does have some sort of... attraction with it, in a sense. Being a bit harder to get might make you more desirable in a way?" Mae said jokingly. A part of her was still being honest with what she was saying. Some people did like the "Chase", so to speak, to be a bit more challenging. Not saying that Mae was one of those people...

"No, they're not mine. I just take care of them until they're adopted." Mae started before her face turned completely red at the question he asked so nonchalantly. "Wha-? I-I mean... I-I guess...? I w-wouldn't be against it per se. Should I end up alone though, I-I'd probably end up adopting one of 'em when I'm a bit older..." And that he could ask her that with a straight face. What was going on inside his head at the moment? Was he just joking around, or did he have some sort of reason for asking? The woman fidgeted nervously in place for a bit, trying to get a grasp on her nerves. "W-Why do you... *Ahem* a-ask?" She eventually stuttered out. Even in her current state, Mae couldn't help but being a bit curious... Had she been drinking anything before he asked, Sharaku would probably been drenched in the very drink she had been trying to consume. It had caught her completely off guard. Whether that was a good or a bad thing remained to be seen however.

"It's the thought that counts, Sharaku. Just... do what you think is right. No one can blame you for doing just that." Yes, indeed. If people blamed you for trying to be of help, then what good were they for you to begin with? Sure, they might not like it at first, but if time was given for them to truly come to terms with what Sharaku had said, then they would surely realize that he only wanted the best for them... "Your intentions are good... it's perhaps the way you say things that causes the strife...?" She suggested. Sometimes, how you worded a sentence could make the recipient react in a completely different way, even though the original message was the same.

"Stuff that happened...? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to..." She asked carefully, not wishing to overstep any personal boundaries, yet forceful enough for him to know that she did this out of genuine concern, and not for the sake of just... holding a conversation. She did take his feelings into account here, after all.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Tue Feb 16, 2016 6:51 pm

He would huff a little. ''Perhaps. Even though it's not intentional in most cases. I just like my privacy. That's all there is to it. I can tease people by witholding certain information on purpose, but that's a different matter altogether. In that case, I'm actually fine with someone chasing me. In others, not always.'' And when he actually did it on purpose, it was generally information that didn't even matter as much in the long run. Just for the fun, so to say. When he did not, however, it could even get annoying. People trying to get something out of him, and him just wanting them to shut up and leave him be. There was a huge difference between the two instances.

''Ah?'' She sure reacted a bit more explosively than he expected. On second thought, he did ask something a little more personal. He was aware of that. She had been taking most things in stride up till now though, so he had not foreseen a response as jumpy as that. And perhaps he just thought that it would be easier for her to talk about kids seeing as she even worked with them. But maybe not. He would chuckle in faint amusement. ''I was simply curious. You said the kids you work with are your everything, so I wondered what you plan for your own future. Since if you dedicate your whole life to them, you'd hardly have your own or anything. Maybe I should have phrased that inquiry differently.'', he would smirk a bit. ''Why did you think I was asking?'' There must have been a reason why did it catch her off guard so blatantly, yes? She probably assumed something about his question, and he would surely like to know what. Nevertheless, he couldn't deny he found her reaction amusing at least.

''Hm...'' He seemed to be in thought, playing with a few strands of his hair. ''Technically, people can do whatever they want to. I know what you mean though.'' He knew that well. He still liked to ponder about what was and could be though. It wasn't really that he didn't accept how things were. He did. He just liked the idea of concepts and possibilities on top of that. Which could come off as odd sometimes, or make people think he was being doomsday. Not the actual truth in most cases. ''It may be. I'm not that good at saying things I mean in a way people can understand. I can't really help that though. Sometimes I just can't find the appropriate words for what I really want to say. Plus, people interpret what they hear in their own way in the end, no matter what I come up with.'', he would say, shrugging slightly. He had come to the conclusion that all he could do is explain several times if he could. Keyword being 'if'.

He appeared to be in a rather lax mood now, seeing as he was actually answering whatever she asked. Well, for now. Didn't meant he would answer something completely ridiculous, were she to come up with such. ''Mm? Everything and anything. Mostly a mix of things that happened two years ago in regards to what we've been discussing recently. Nothing concrete, really.'' He wasn't focusing on anything on purpose. It was more about the general feeling of it, rather than what he was actually thinking about.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 1:28 pm

"Heh, I see. I wonder... is it better for it to be natural...?" Mae asked... Moreso metaphorically, rather than a serious question, as the answer was very different from person to person.

"O-Oh. I see..." Mae said with a sheepish smile, scratching the back of her neck as the blush slowly vanished from her face. "Well, I've grown quite attached to them over the course of time. Of course, I want them to get a family for themselves, but... a part of me is always a bit sad to see one of them go..." Especially some of the younger kids there... she had practically raised them since then, and seeing them leave for another home was a good thing, but it left the woman somewhat empty afterwards. "W-Well... Umm... How do I put this...?" Mae started somewhat nervously. "Remember when we used to... you know... date? Y-Yeah..." It was a bit silly now that she thought about it, with the information in hand, but still.

"It's not always easy, yeah..." Well, at least he was trying his best. And could one ask for more than that? Not really. How do you even demand someone to do more than their best? "Well, at least you try. Some doesn't even bother with it all." She knew plenty of people like that. Her old classmates in Japan... ugh, some of them were real jerks.

"Two years ago, huh..." Was he thinking about them...? "I know those weren't the best of times. I tend not to think about that too much. Only the happier moments seemed to really stick with me." Which she had her fair share of, come to think of it. Sure, there had been a lot of bad things back then too, but the good outweighed the bad...

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 2:01 pm

''I think it is. In general, it is probably better for things to be natural. Forcing it or such means it is not genuine in the end.'' Wasn't that right? Of course, someone may say differently, but he wouldn't think pretense was very good in most cases. Or anything of the kind, really.

Hm, indeed. ''How long? They way you speak...you seem to get enough time with them to get attached before they go. How often do people actually go out of their way to adopt a kid?'' Very peculiar interest, yes. And he should also hope she would not get ideas about what it meant again. It really meant nothing. He was curious, and so he asked. She was likely to know the answer afterall. It would be really awkward if she tried to find a meaning behind his odd questioning. He would look at her, his expression a little confused at first. Yeah, they had. He hadn't been thinking about that though. What did it have to do with his question? ''....'' Well. ''I wasn't even thinking of that. And now that I am, the question just sounds more creepy the longer I consider it.'', he would purse his lips slightly. ''Should I be worried that you think of such as the first thing?'', he'd ask in a joking tone.

''Mm, yes...'' There wasn't much to say, was there? Sure, he tried. That's kind of the end of that, isn't it? At the very least, he couldn't find anything smart to say to keep that conversation going. ''I think about everything. Doesn't really matter whether it's good or bad. It's not like avoiding either makes my life better. No matter though. It's the concept itself that makes me feel sad. Not what happened exactly. I can't really explain it.'' And it's not like his feeling would really matter to her in the long run. It was complicated enough for him.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 2:19 pm

Mae nodded. "Indeed. Sure, it could be fun every now and again to be mysterious on purpose, but... it's not something one should make a habit of." Unless one REALLY didn't want to share. Some things people were better off not knowing.

"Oh, that varies. Some of them I've known since I started working there. Kayle and Kevin are the two I know the best. It could take weeks, months or even years. And some vanish in a couple of days. Usually the adoption period takes a little while. Of course I'm more attached to those that have been there longer. I was stuck at my orphanage for about what... 10-11 years or something? I had multiple interviews myself of course, but most of the adults that interviewed me ended up picking someone else... Dunno why. The same goes for some of these kids. At present... The staff there are the closest thing to a family they have." It was rough on some of them. Especially the first weeks, when the loss of family hurt the most for them. Not that Mae had gone through that herself, given that she had never even met her real parents to begin with. Mae giggled somewhat nervously at his reaction. "Maybe~?" She replied in the same joking tone, giving Sharaku a teasing wink as an added bonus. Play it off, Mae.

"I suppose avoiding it doesn't make a difference... but I'd like to think that I got more good things out of my first year here..." And indeed... 2016 had been a life-changing year for Mae, and she would never forget the things that had transpired there. She had started at a new school, met tons of good, new friends, aquired special powers, helped a friend confront himself, stopped another friend from doing something they would regret... she even fell in love. Not just once... not twice, but three times over. Back then, it had been tough to choose... Now that time had passed since then, Mae had been more focused on her own life, and trying to pull the pieces of it together, while helping the kids. It was a tough balancing act, but she had been through worse.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 3:49 pm

He would raise an eyebrow questioningly. ''Do you not like mystery?'' Of course, being genuine was better when things mattered, but if you could judge the situation well enough, a bit of playing around was usually okay. Unless the other side had a problem with it right off the bat. Perhaps a balance was good for this. Being honest all the time could also mean you'd get easily taken for granted and seem boring. That is, he was refering to the kind of mystery that was for fun, not to actually withhold the information for real.

Shoot. She could certainly get talkative. He didn't really need to hear all that at once as a response to his question. Still, he would listen quietly. He didn't necessarily mind. It was just a little strange to hear her get so fired up after one simple question. ''Can they even adapt to a new family anymore after staying there for so long? They would already be quite old enough by that point. It's not easy to see someone as a mother and father all of a sudden after you pass a certain age.'' He couldn't see himself doing that. At least, speculating based on what he was like when he was young. A kid that is old enough already knows the new people aren't their real parents, and well, it will never be the same as a normal family. Then again, it's not like those kids had elsewhere to go, unless they grew up so much they could leave and live their own life...

He would simply smile softly when she joked back, not gracing a verbal response in return anymore. Why would be anyone's guess. ''You always try to be the optimist, hm?'', he would remark. Whether he meant it in a good or a bad way was up to her to decide. Even though he had his moments of being easygoing and all, he would always be hard to read in the end. For pretty much everyone, unless someone managed to solve him completely.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 4:18 pm

"I do like it... As long as it's not overdone, or something." Mae answered him with a light shrug. While it was fun for a little while, some people just didn't know when to quit, and it could drive her a bit... nuts. Luckily, Sharaku was good with that for the most part.

Mae shrugged again at this response. "Depends on the person, and the ones adopting them. They really can't stay at the Orphanage forever... Sure, it might be a bit rough on them, just as rough as it can be for us... but that's just how the cycle goes." Kids came and went. Some stayed longer, while others vanished pretty quickly. One thing was certain though... they all had a home there, and even when they moved away from the orphanage, Mae and the rest of the staff remembered them all equally, and fondly. "It stings a little bit seeing them go, but... you just have to move on, and wish them the best of luck with their new family." It wasn't an easy job, but it was one she thoroughly enjoyed nontheless. Nothing could be worse than what she went through during her first year here on Azores. Nothing.

"Heh, yeah. I try to be, at least." Mae said with a cheerful smile. "It's not always like that for me though... At times, even I have trouble seeing the good side in some matters..." No one was perfect, and Mae was no exception to that rule. She had her flaws, and many of them. But indeed, it's one's perfections and imperfections that makes the individual who they are. And sometimes, being flawed had it's benefits.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 5:08 pm

His eyes would drop down a bit. This again. He just didn't know what to say. Like, at all. Frankly, he wasn't even sure why had he started her asking about the kids in the first place. For some reason, he just felt compelled to inquire, but he didn't even know what was he hoping to accomplish by it. Well, he usually tried to be optimistic enough and tell himself nothing was wrong with it, but sometimes he was not so certain. It wasn't normal for his mood to turn 180° at the drop of a hat. And many times he didn't even know what exactly caused it. At times, it was all okay, and he went through his day just fine. And then sometimes...it just felt wrong. It was odd. And he didn't know if it was something she said, or just him being really out there. This was no good. He was simply drawing a pure blank as to what to say back to her. Literally nothing. It was probably visible anyway. He must have looked like someone just dropped a bucket of water over him, and made him a soppy wet puppy or something.

''................''

He wasn't liking this. He couldn't act like this. It was already hard enough to seem at least understandable for others, and then this. He just wanted to go mope in a corner right now, because that felt like the most sound option. On the contrary though, he would remain standing where he was, his head bowed slightly.

''Yeah....''

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 5:25 pm

When Sharaku fell silent, Mae stood there too, silent at first, waiting for him to say something... When he didn't, she knew something was wrong. She could feel it. The girl looked around the immediate area for a place to sit down, without leaving Sharaku. Once she spotted a bench not to far away from them, the woman would take Sharaku's hand in a firm, reassuring grip before slowly walking with him over to the bench, before sitting down. Even when they reached the bench, she wouldn't let go of his hand unless he forcefully dragged it away, or if he asked her to let go.

"Hey... Is everything alright...? You're not like this usually... Did I say anything wrong?"

She asked eventually in a soft voice, trying to look into his eyes from where she sat, trying to at least give him some comfort while she was still there. This had come out of nowhere. Even if she couldn't do anything about it, she would at least be there... if only as a physical presence.

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 5:47 pm

Well, despite the state he was in now, he was nowhere near being completely irrational or such. Thus, he wouldn't protest when Mae led him away from the spot to sit down. It was probably for the better anyway. He wasn't sure whether he wanted to be standing right now. In fact, he didn't seem to be protesting against anything she did, pretty much.

He would look at her briefly, before turning his head to the side. ''It's...not you, it's me. I'll be fine though....I just don't feel too good right now...'', he would mumble, leaning back against the bench and closing his eyes. He wasn't lying about the last one. Sometimes your state of mind can even make you feel physically sick. At the very least, it wasn't anything serious such as an injury. At any rate, he did hope it had nothing to do with her. Even though it was hard to discern. There had to have been some sort of trigger to all this. It could have been anything though. Too much annoying noise from back in the club. The amount of conversation getting to him. Or just the stress of the whole situation and all. It could be almost anything in his case. He hasn't figured out a solid pattern yet, and it wasn't always the same. Not even his actual reaction was always the same one. He was just floored for a moment right now. What would come out of this eventually, he did not know. He would breath out through his nose. ''I'm sorry. I shouldn't be putting you through this....''

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 6:03 pm

"Ah... I see." Her grip of his hand tightened just for a split second. She knew that he would indeed recover from this. "You know me... I won't leave you like this." She would give him a light smile, holding his hand with both of her own now, letting the beforementioned hand rest on her lap.

"Oh, Sharaku..." She spoke softly. "There's no need to apologize." A light smile made it's way across her face before she gave him a friendly hug, warm and comforting, as she waited for this to blow over. How long it would last, she would let Sharaku decide. If he needed that sort of comforting that is...

Subject: Re: Two Years Later... [Sharaku] Wed Feb 17, 2016 6:47 pm

He would chuckle weakly. ''Somehow, I suspected you would say that.'' She was not the one to walk off. That was something he knew. Although, that didn't change the slight distress over the fact that it would probably be better for her not to deal with this. It wasn't that he directly blamed himself, but he just didn't want to stress even her out. He was aware what it was like to be next to someone and not really know what was up or how would it go. It was not the nicest feeling. He was honestly conflicted over this. Yes, it was better to not handle things alone....and still, he did not like the thought that he would be saddling someone else with his own problems. It just wasn't very okay in his book to do that. He knew he should, but that alone was hard. And perhaps it was also a habit. He was used to be the one taking care of others when something came up. Ironically, he was always the one even when he was younger. He still remembered what he was like during those experiments...and the things he's done... It was just in times like right now that...well, he could do nothing. Perhaps it was also a mild case of burnout. He wouldn't be surprised if it was a bunch of things at once.

He was so busy trying to think about something so he wouldn't have to focus on the downy things, that he hardly noticed Mae moving about until she hugged him, for that was not something he could pass over. Because if he were capable of not noticing something as big as a hug, then things would be even worse than wrong. He would tense up briefly, rather hesitant about what to do. It wasn't that he didn't want this...but...

''......''

He would sigh. That's how it ends, hm? She probably did not expect him to seriously react, and if so, then she would get a bit of a surprise. Deflating slightly, he would actually wrap his arms around her, hugging back as he rested his chin on her shoulder, his eyes still closed. ''Is there or is there not? I still feel like I ought to....''

» Those seven years ago [Phile]
» Two Years Ago Huh? (Rylue)
» 5 years ago [Flashback Tawpic]
» Two years...where it all began and ended.
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