Roll up in the club like "Waddup, I got a Nuzlocke"

Hello boys, girls, owls, and robotic canines for some reason! If you haven't been living under a rock for the past 6 months, you're probably aware that Pokemon Sun & Moon was just released! I got me a Moon and Imma do a Nuzlocke of it.

Yo, Dai. The fuck is a Nuzlocke?

The Nuzlocke Challenge is a way to play Pokemon designed to give me a goddamn ulcer make the game more challenging. Essentially it makes it much more difficult to complete and adds character death. I can't catch too many Pokemon and if my Pokemon faints, it's dead for good and I have to throw it in the PC Box never to be seen again.

Why the hell would anyone do that?

lol I dunno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Da Rulez

• I'm flying blind from here on out. That means I'm forbidden from looking up Pokemon information, asking Google, going to Bulbapedia, etc. I can't stop people if they want to tell me stuff, but I'm not allowed to ask or phrase a statement or question like I'm fishing for answers.
  
• If my Pokemon faints, it's dead for good. I need to either release it or store it in the PC. Similarly, if I black out, I lose the game. You have also just lost The Game.
  
• I can't use Revives for any reason, even if I died to fucking bullshit.
  
• I can only catch the first Pokemon I see per area (like Route 1 or Dark Cave). If I kill it or fail to catch it or run away, it's gone and I don't get to catch another. The exception to this is if it's a Pokemon I already have, then I can try again up to twice but on the third time I have to catch it or lose it. If I'm in a Horde or Multi Battle, I can catch any Pokemon out of those I want.
  
• I am only allowed to use items in Gym Leader, Rival, Boss, or similar battles. Then I can use 1 item or as many as my opponent uses. I can use items as many times as I want outside of battle excluding revives. Pokemon can use whatever Held Items they can take advantage of.
  
• I cannot trade online. I may make in-game trades with NPCs and accept gift Pokemon, though.
  
• I can breed as many Pokemon as I want, but I can only raise 1 egg that will join my party. All other Pokemon I breed for moves/stats cannot ever enter battle and must be released/stored as soon as I'm done with them.
  
• If I need to have a Pokemon learn an HM and I own a Pokemon that can learn that move, it has to learn it so I can proceed. If I have no Pokemon that can learn such moves I'm allowed to catch one that can, have it faint, and then use it that way so it won't enter battle but I can proceed.
  
• Whatever the new PokemonAmie's called? I can take advantage of that as much as I want. The powah of luuuuuv, baby! ~<3
  
• Pokemon Battle style is Set and if I know how many Pokemon a gym leader, Kahuna, whatever is gonna use I need to use the same amount. Gotta fight like an NPC here.
  
• No EXP share, it's just lazy.
  
• If I see a shiny, all bets are fucking off. Imma catch that lil shitz.
  

So I want input from you guys if you want to screw me over help me out! For major decisions like what starter I should pick, which fossil, etc... I'll be asking the gracious people of New Arcana to help me decide! My choice will go to either who's there and speaks first or who's most vocal, can't be waitin' forever. I'll also name whatever I catch whatever people want, but keep in mind if you want to be named after a specific Pokemon your odds are pretty slim since I can only catch 1 per area.

So let's get crackin'!

Crap I said I'd do

• Be a BAMF Check!
  
• Name my 1st bug type after Lost!
  
• Joyd spits Supa Hot Fiya
  
• Death is a not-trash fighting type... Kay!
  
• Jack with dat good weed tho
  
• Sheeps is memes. Yo wat.
  
• Desh ish kyewt Eevee \(^o^)/ (oooooor Psychic or Ghost, depends on what I catch)
  
• REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
  
• Brit wants a pretty Primarina
  
• StellaPanthera yearns to be a real boy panther thing.
  

Kay. Imma add my promises to the first post. First bug type goes to Losto!

(Just fyi, but that HM rule is useless since they were removed in Sun/Moon lol)

Can I be something Fire type? : 3

Mmhmm! I didn't know about the HM thing, but I guess that makes things easier!

You just got 1 Rowlett vote. Also, if you could, name me after a fighting type pls? I would prefer it to at least be mediocre. Also I luv nuzlocke and DO THIS SHIT.

Yo! Sense lost took the best type out there ever that isn't Steel... Name your first Grass Type after Ol' Jack.

Also word of advice, if you happen to get your hands on a Dirt Horse use it. They are surprisingly good.

Okey dokey, sounds great, Jack! I'll see about grabbin' me one, but I ain't in control of what I catch.

If you ever get a sheep Pokemon you must name it "Yo Wat."

If you grab a Mimikyu, name it after me~

Le eevee or an eevee evolution get them all one cause we don't shut up about them and we love them. <3 Hehe. XP

But jokes aside, le icy vulpix/ninetails you get one name it after us. =)

Outside of that good luck with game challenge.

Edit: Booo!! Found out Moon no get icy Vulpix, so we demand you to name an eevee or eevee evolution after us. If that is still a no fine...I'll settle with having my name on a ghost or physic type whichever comes first.

YOU BETTER NAME A ROWLET BERNARD MOTHERFUCKER

OR I WILL COME FOR YOU

Im just messing with you, but seriously. Who could resist that? Name rowlet bernard if you took it

Poll's closed! The votes are in! XD

Because the votes for Rowlet and Popplio are even, I'm gonna go with Rowlet due to threats of violence user preference in the thread plz Bern I need my eyes, they help me see things! DX

I'll be starting up sometime tonight with unfiltered commentary of what's happening/happened up to the point I'm at whenever something big and exciting happens. Yyyyyyep, it's gon' be one of those Nuzlocke runs, folks. Whenever I catch something that doesn't have any sort of special requests beforehand I'll be asking the chatbox what everyone wants me to name it, first come first serve.

Stay tuned.

So I get a call from my cousin or uncle or... y'know, I really don't know who he is. How'd he get my number? Anyway he wanted to talk about my trip to the Alolan Region. There's some pretty chill Pokemon there, but the trees are dragons and that freaks me out a little. I'm just left wondering why he called his puppy up to tell it to go away... Then he asked me about my passport photo, which was kind of creepy. Like, I don't think anyone outside of my immediate family should be handling that, but whatever. What's weird though is how I don't remember being a little girl at any point in my life. Or black.

...OKAY. So he's my cousin! And he has no idea what my name is! And he's handling my passport! I'm sooooo glad my mom called me away so I can pack boxes instead of pretending like I'm not creeped out by my weirdo cousin.


Ah fuck... the Meowth is meowthing at me again. Jesus Christ, it's fucking 9 o'clock at night, I just wanna sleeeeeeeeeeep.... with my shoes on... and fully dressed for some reason. Okay, fine, I might've had a few too many on the flight over. But it was free! Right up until the public drinking ticket, anyway. Dayum, Alola got no chill. Sooooo... Mom sent Meowth to get me? Doesn't SHE know it's fucking 9 o'clock at night?

So my cousin just lets himself into my house. I'm pretty sure the door was locked, too. He also calls my mom Mom. This family's fuckin' weird. Apparently Kukui's a pretty good trainer though. I... guess it balances out all the crazy?

Wait wut. So my mom wants me to head to the next town over... AT NINE O'CLOCK AT FUCKIN' NIGHT... with this stalker weirdo? ...I'm gonna end up on the news, aren't I?


So apparently, despite be completely Zubatshit crazy, Kukui's pretty respected and knows what he's talking about. Like an idiot savant with Pokemon. But he tells me to go find the island kahuna. The fuck is a kahuna? Kukui says "he looks just like a kahuna" but this does not help me for I have not frame of reference on what the FUCK a kahuna is! Yo, dude, get me the thingamabob. The fuck is a thingamabob? Dude, it looks like all the other thingamabobs, just go get it! I'm pretty sure he's brain damaged. Poor guy . I still don't want him in my damn house, though.

Speaking of brain damaged, I am now following this girl in a big floppy hat that is periodically talking to her duffel bag. No, not like that you fuckin' perv, I wanna make sure she doesn't hurt herself or, y'know, swan dive off a bridge into the dirt. I'm gettin' some real messed up vibes from her. Oh fuck. She's, like, staring out over the bridge. This bitch gon' jump off, I fuckin' knew i- OOOOOOOH. She has a POKEMON on the bridge. Why the fuck doesn't she put it back in the ball? I try to tell her this but she's kinda too distraught to figure it the fuck.

I try to walk away but she just starts screaming at me to save it. She's pretty damn close to that ledge alright... damnit. Fine, whatever, I'm gonna get my arms scratched up punching at stupid birds.


THAT LITTLE PUFFBALL MOTHERFUCKER TRIED TO KILL ME. This crazy bitch lured me out onto the bridge and tried to give me the ol' Aloha Snackbar! Luckily, shit just happens to work out for me all the time and I get saved by one of the Robot Masters from Mega Man. This island's fuckin' weird. I'm about to deck this crazy girl when she starts having an in-depth conversation with her... whatever the hell that thing is. I can't hit crazy people, man. I'm pretty sure she bites, too. Then she gives me a rock and says it's mine now. I don't... I don't even know, man. But she asks me to take her back to town and to keep her Pokemon a secret. Maybe she was just having an episode. Like, why the fuck would you come all the way out here, give strangers shiny rocks, and then come all the way back to town?

OH. OKAY. THIS makes sense now. The schizoid chick is Kukui's "assistant". I don't even wanna know what that means, but crazy tends to attract crazy. So the kahuna comes back and... holy shit. He actually does look like a kahuna. That doesn't even make any fucking sense but it works I guess? Whatever, Lillie pretends like her puffball didn't just try to blow me the fuck up, IMMEDIATELY tells Kukui about the thing she told me not to tell anyone about, and apparently the weird spiky Robot Master thing was the island deity? Eh, fuck it, free Pokemon!

OOC:

HOLY. FUCK. That owl has a bow tie! I MUST have it! C'mere, c'mere wittle bow tie owl, Imma get you a little top hat... I named him Bernie, like the Mac. Cuz this little guy a mac daddy muthafucka. Next thing I know some punkass runs up and wants to fight me. I'm about to lay this asshole out when the kahuna shows up. Apparently their related, so I can't knock his teeth out. Then this kid starts talkin' Pokemon, so I'm thinkin' to myself, "I'm about to stuff this owl down your goddamn throat". Then the kahuna takes my shiny rock because I beat his son in Pokemon or whatever. He said I was a poor sport. I probably shouldn't have yelled "SUCK MY NUTS, BEE-YOOOOOOTCH!!" after I won, but he was bein' a punk. Whatever, I'll get the rock back later.

Wait... why do even fucking care about a rock some crazy girl gave me?