Pop-Up Pummeler, Game 1 [Sosina/Lunar/Fanta/Ribbon]

Eryka was relieved to have survived the round but that did not deter her from yet again putting herself into the danger zone. She snatched up the beach ball, for who could be angered by a beach ball, and held it over head to bop Albrecht with.

Number twelve.

With nothing but the splintered remains of the tennis racket, the smol boi let the pieces go, before deciding to grab the hammer that was probably about his size, lugging it over comically and preparing to bop the knight.

> Number 5, because what could go wrong?

Triboulet yelled as retreated back into Lupin's mind. Lupin was relieved at the fact that Triboulet will shut up for a bit. "Thank you so much, you have no idea how much that means to me."

Lupin then turns his attention to the shovel. and proudly proclaim "I pick item 6, insert clever buried alive joke here."

Lupin started to wield the shovel like a spear.

He is going to die there is no doubt about that. He is going to get eviscerated.

Please donate to his patron, where he uses the money to help the orphans in Selene.

All Lupin earned himself was an eyeroll. "Yeah, sure, whatever. You're welcome. Get your ass moving, we only have ambulance service booked for so long."

"Right, get ready!"



The group descended upon Albrecht. The spade broke with pathetic ease, snapping the very moment it made contact with the crusader. The beach ball burst, covering the knight's head and threatening to choke him...were it not for a flash of mysterious lightning that left only charred fragments floating into the air.

Tomomi hefted the hammer, and swung it down...

To find nothing happening. Albrecht merely continued the chant as the mallet gained a helmet shaped indentation.


"Starting to get down to the wire! Can you feel the tension in the air?!"

Breathing heavily as he continued to not be dead, the smol boi went back to ol' faithful: the feather duster, number 10.

"...I wonder who buried Albrecht to start with....he must be melting in that armour..." Eryka looked over the items left behind, rubbing her chin in deep contemplation. There was not many left was there? Hmm...this increased the likelihood of her picking the one that would anger Albrecht. Still, at best it was a one in six chance of her getting unlucky, so she simply threw caution to the wind. She grasped number seven, whatever it was, and bonked Abrecht's helmet with it.

Lupin Just ran to the gun to use it again.

"Number 2. Let's bust some more caps into him."

Lupin life flashed before his eyes. This is the end for him. Lupin then said to the others before they start. "If I die tell Lisa I was thinking about her until the end."

Lupin was ready for judgement.

"I don't get it myself. He seems to just...descend, on his own. Like there's a lift hidden in there."
"And there isn't one, we've check- hey, we're not a last words delivery service!"

"Ugh. From the top..."


A familiar, ominous air descended as the group fell back to their standbys. Dusters tickled, and gunshots rang out, but the moment seemed to focus around Eryka as the air gathered around her.

Wind whirled about the snooker cue, a tornado that crackled with electricity which tapered to a point at its very end as the cadet speared toward the knight in the sand.

As the cue turned spear made contact, terrible winds threw everyone back, the cutting winds forming an expanding pillar around the knight as he ascended.


The shattered wreck of a robotic arm was scattered near a ruined ambulance, gurneys and medical equipment half-buried under chunks of burning metal.

The game runner turned to Lupin. "And THIS is why we need that contract! You think they're going to ruin vehicles and endanger staff like this without exorbitant pay?! Now pick something again, we're on a timer now that we broke the first ambulance!"

Once more, Tomomi returned to the giant hammer, hoping and praying he wasn't the next one to perish.

> Number 5, stay alive

Lupin trades the gun for the umbrella.
Lupin then says "Number 1."

Triboulet came back with one comment before quickly retreating. "Who's the dumb ass who thought this was a good idea."

Lupin then said "if its Julius I swear to god. He is gonna get hit."

Lupin is ready to die.

"Oi oi oi, put the-"

"WHO THE FUCK LABELLED THE UMBRELLA?!"

"The background artist is going to kill me...fine. Let's just do this."


The winds of change and a bunch of editing software brushed the scene as the group assaulted Albrecht.

Or...as, uh. Lupin, assaulted him. While he was busy assaulting Albrecht, the end of Tomomi's hammer had fallen off as he picked it up.

It would appear it had suffered enough for today.


"Alright, alright, artist placated, background scrubbed...you better be grateful, you know!"

"F-feather duster, s-save me cleanliness!"

> Number 10

Lupin just said "I pick number 2. If I die tell Julius he is a god damn cowardly bitch. Like seriously tell him to fecking do something with his other then getting maids to stuff salad up his asshole. Steak bras are better."

Lock & Load. Lupin is ready to fire.

"...no."

"Once more, with feeling..."


As the countdown ended, it was soon impossible to approach Albrecht. The little pistol in Lupin's hands had become deadlier than ever before, spewing quantities and calibres that would not fit at rates it should not be able to manage. A hail of lead descended on the figure in the sands, promising death.

As ever, that promise was not being made to Albrecht, but by him.

The knight walked through the sands as if they weren't there, rising from the ground with hammer in hand as a sandstorm whipped about his form.


As Lupin's horribly mauled form was dumped unceremoniously into a wheelbarrow to be taken away, the game master approached Tomomi, beaming towards the scared boy. "Congratulations on your performance! You should be proud - you made it this far without a scratch! Here's your reward." They press a small handful of seashells into the boy's hand, and shake it vigorously. "Again, congratulations! Enjoy the rest of your time at the Isle, alright?"

As they walked off with their clipboard toward the group headed to the hospital, a suddenly far more disgruntled voice trailed off.

"Alright you little shit, let's see which orifices we can stuff these things in..."

And so, the victorious survivor left the scene, mostly thankful to be alive. With his prize of seashells, the litter kid left.