New Year Old Problems (Maria)

Axel was standing in front of the grade postings after exams, although he looked calm as his eyes darted down the list of names looking for his own, in his mind it was a different story. "Damn it all! I'm already on the borderline in terms of my average this semester if I don't pull through here then I'm screwed! Why! Why can't you do something right for once in your life!" He thought to himself as for a second his hand trembled as it moved down the list. He put his arms at his side and let out a deep breath. As much as it hurt, these feelings of insecurity were no stranger to Axel.

Ever since the divide and entering Seven Stars the problems he's experienced as a child have only amplified. It felt like his life was a mess, his only parent away in another part of the city fighting to keep them both afloat financially, his own feelings of uselessness and insecurity, and the lack of close friends to talk to. Every year it was the same thing. He was in 3rd year now, but it felt like nothing has changed. He turned away from the board and looked out of the window on the other side and for the first time in a long time the facade on his face cracked, just a little as for a brief moment he let the pain show before looking down. I want to change... I need to change... but... how?

It was a bothersome time for Maria as she stared at the board. She was able to pass fairly well. Her studies were on point, which was rather miraculous considering how busy she was as a Cadet. But Father Jorge's tutoring was something to be grateful of. Speaking of which, perhaps she could bring back a small gift to him when hanging out with Father Jorge. She was about to head elsewhere, maybe to kill time reading a textbook for the next class session. But she noticed someone looking down, perhaps feeling despair. Or perhaps he was sick. The postulant walked towards this boy before tapping him on the shoulder.


What the boy would notice was a woman dressed as a nun. But most importantly that made her stand out most was the coffin she hefted on her back without any visible strain. Maria tried to remain rather composed and amicable. But who knows if it would do any good?

Without looking Axel pinched his nose and slowly turned to the voice he heard while saying "yeah I'm fi-" He wouldn't get to finish that sentence as what he saw was a nun hefting a coffin without any effort whatsoever. "ok..." he said pointing to himself "am I OK?.. You are carrying a coffin in the middle of the school!" He yells in shock, gesturing at the thing on her back "What do you have in there, why are you dressed as a nun!" She had caught him completely off guard, never in a million years would he have imagined the sight he was seeing, in a school nonetheless. After taking a moment to compose himself he turned back to the girl "Sorry you kind of caught me by surprise. You uuuh need any help with that coffin?" He asks, not knowing what else to say at the current time.

She should've known better by now that her coffin made her stand out way too much. But lately when she was interacting with her peers, Maria got too used to people not minding it as much since it carried her important piece of equipment to fighting Psyche-Terrorists and Demons. She ignored the previous questions since she didn't want to make the information about her being a Cadet public. Not that it was something to hide, but more like she wanted to keep her work and life separate after all.

She looked up at the scoreboard while asking him, "Didn't do too well?"

"Well... I'm not too sure yet" Axel says with a confident smile before looking out the window again. "You asked me if I was alright. You see the truth is something has been on my mind..." as these words left his mouth his mind was racing, "What the hell are you thinking, you only met her just now and what? You're gonna have a heart to heart? Get real." He cleared his throat before continuing, "You see one of my friends has been really worried about school, he doesn't have a lot of self-confidence and there's a lot of pressure for him to do well. I can only do so much for him and he seems to be having such a hard time but I don't know how to help him. Because of that, I've been kind of down." He had a somber look on his face which could easily be mistaken for concern for the "friend" he just mentioned.

Maria was admittedly not too savvy with things such as this. But since she was the one that bothered to get involved with someone else's problems, it would be pretty sad if she opted out so quickly. Hopefully, it helped. If not, at least she tried. Right?

Axel chuckled, "That's what I've been telling him..." He turned around and faced the board and began looking for his name again. "At the end of the day, you can only change yourself. Nobody can force or do that for you. But..." His thought was cut off as he finally found his place on the board. He looked over and closed his eyes while smiling. Pretty good and on target. He turned back to the strange girl with the coffin. "Out of curiosity why did you decide to help? It would've been just as easy to turn the other way and get on with your day. I'm sure you have your own problems to deal with and have better things to do than helping me." He asked because honestly, that was something he would do. He wasn't strong enough to bear his own problems, let alone someone else's. Because of that, he wasn't close to many people... What convinced people like her to go out of the way like this? That's what he wanted to know.

It was really simple as she said. But she tried to remain nonchalant about it. Maria didn't really want any praise for it. It was for her own self-gratification, after all. And that's what it really boils down to when it comes to altruism. Father Jorge was careful to let her know what all of that really meant in the end.

"Is it really that simple? You want to do it so you do..." He muttered to himself. There wasn't a lot of thought to it, no concern for what you were doing, your own capability to help, or if you were even able to make the problem better. In a way, it almost felt selfish but at the same time... liberating. In a way, he was also selfish. He didn't want to see other people's issues because he was blinded by his own. Although he told himself it was because he couldn't help them, was that really the case? Could he really know that without trying? He grinned as he extended his hand "My name's Axel, Axel Bodard. What's yours?" Maybe he could change after all, but it wouldn't be from sulking and sitting alone with his own problems. He needed others and he needed to know more about the world, the life he was currently living was too small to find his answer.

She could hear him, but decided to keep quiet. Maria couldn't blame him. Not many people would go out of their way to help others. Usually they wanted something in return. But here was someone like Maria who flat out said she wanted to help others. Though she didn't really mind. The Cadet took his hand and shook it.

"Alright, Maria it is" He says as he looks up at the clock in the hall before turning back. "Looks like there's still plenty of time to kill, you wanna grab lunch?" It looked like this year wouldn't be the same thing after all, not if Axel had a say in it.

She shook her head at him while smiling sadly, "I'm sorry. I have other matters to attend to, they require my attention. Maybe next time, Axel. I'll be seeing you later and best of luck for your friend!"

Maria gave a light friendly wave as she left.

[Exit]

Axel of The Emperor Arcana and Maria of the Chariot Arcana have established a Social Link